Thursday, August 28, 2008

The Countdown is On

One week from today, the kids start their school year. They are all excited. Very excited. I have to admit, I'm excited as well, but also a little hesitant. Does my excitement make me a bad mom by today's standards? (I'll skip my soapbox on our kid-centric society for today - no thanks needed!) I feel ashamed to admit to most of my friends that I am looking forward to the kids going to school. I'm especially ashamed when it comes to my 3 year old daughter. I find myself feeling guilty when I read the mom articles and talk to my mom friends. There are one or two that share my feelings, but they are also reserved about admitting it in public. Now, I'm not suggesting that we all throw a parade and run down the street shouting with glee, but I do wish that it was more socially acceptable to be happy to see the school year come. I remember my mom saying (frequently by the end of August) that she couldn't wait for school to start. Now I know how she felt. But these days, I'm not supposed to want to pack them off on the bus. I'm supposed to want to drive them myself, both to and from school, and spend every waking minute making sure that their lives are happy and easy. I just don't have either the energy or the belief that is in their best interests.

I AM going to miss the lazy days spent in the sunshine and having my babies all to myself. But let's be honest - they are getting bored with me and their siblings. They crave both the social opportunities and the stimulation. And Matthew is in dire need of occupational therapies that are beyond my limited abilities. I am going to enjoy sending them off to school, missing them during the day and getting those hugs and the the run-down of their days when they get off the bus or I pick them up from daycare. I might not be the best mom, but I think that for my kids, I'm doing OK.

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